On my 24th birthday,
of course – I must reflect.
With every new year that’s begun, and every year that’s passed,
there’s a sense of reflection,
that I aim to acknowledge.
Because it’s worth it.
For another year;
is a gift – in and of itself.
And therefore, I write.
[sidenote: I’m writing this in the airport after my flight was delayed for the third time –– after a quick trip to the Florida sunshine. I mentioned this to give you a little backstory of my whereabouts upon typing.]
To begin,
This year – I opt for the softer moments.
The ones that are uncalled for,
sometimes spent in solitude,
other times accompanied by those who elate you.
Those that drown out your senses entirely...
Soft moments like…
taking time to awaken
before the sun melts into the sky
in the early morning hours.
Awaiting the pops of illustrious, marigold yellows,
the golden minutes of daylight.
Soft hints of ultramarine blue,
Over ripples of sheer, iridescent water flows.
Bellowing below oceans of multi-dimensional color.
My soul wades through the dripping colors,
swimming in the radiant warmth of solitary moments –
The ones that make me feel blissfully free.
I’ve learned it takes courage
to dip my fingers down
into the painted crevices of my mind.
Tracing the swirling, painted colors with the pad of my index finger,
gently gliding ideas and emotions around the inside of my skull,
ripples of words and blurred hues,
A whirlpool of thoughts and feelings.
Carefully waiting for the right moment,
to pluck one out.
To allow it to submerge from my mindful depths…
Finding a slight tug
and pull,
ensuring that I have a grip on one that is adequate –
an idea I can bring to life.
Once I choose an idea, I tread around it slightly.
Massaging the idea around for a bit,
Feeling the pulsating colors and vibrations.
Letting the idea submerge into itself,
Up and into the patterned array of bubbles.
Experiencing my subconscious thoughts in the purest form,
unfolding before my very eyes – viscerally.
In visual 2-dimensional images,
In between layers
of canvas linens,
Brush strokes,
Sketch paper,
And pencil markings.
Creative energy that is controlled,
yet unabashedly released all at once.
Therefore, I ache for more soft moments like this.
Where my creative energy is channeled,
and quality time is spent with those I value most.
Rising up from the deepest canyons of my days to the highest highs – to take a breath.
Here’s to another year of the most precious gift – that I take for granted sometimes – life itself – another day – another breath.
